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Flynn’s NDTA Blog |
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Monday 2 November 2009 Well, after the weekend, I am no longer a bad dog. No, I am a good boy. On Saturday, I got second in the flygility beginners plate. Mum got a flash ribbon and I got a big bag of dog food - no plate though. Maybe that’s what Kyte gets for winning? And in intermediate I got two points. Mum says that I only need to get 11 more and I can be an efdee (whatever that is). Must be pretty special. On Sunday, we had the ribbon trial. I spent most of the day in the car which was BORING! But I was allowed to do a little bit of agility and rally. At first I was annoyed that the black and white thing got to do obedience when I wasn’t allowed. But he must have been REALLY BAD because Dawn didn’t judge him. And he must be much worser at stays than me cos he did them outside the ring! Mum says that he is still a puppy. No puppy is that big. Besides, I like puppies. I kind of found the starters course a bit gay, so I did a few extra jumps. And just to show Mum that I had got over my thing about the tyre jump, I went through it THREE times! Joanne the judge thought I was very creatif (whatever that is). Then I did my rally test. Every time Mum did an exercise right, I told Lyn the judge. Mum called me loopy locks. We only lost two points. I wonder if they are same two points I got from flygility? Anyway, can I help it if some dog has left an interesting smell on one of the signs or if I can’t wag my tail and think at the same time? I mean, I am only a dog. But, you know what, I WON!!!! Mum got another flash ribbon and another special bit of paper. Nothing for me though. By the time jumpers started, it was raining and Mum ran like a girl! No clear wownd but Mum said she was happy cos I didn’t change the course (much). I think she was just happy to get out of the rain and do her judging thing inside. Friday 30 October 2009 Mum says I can’t possibly have anything more to say about the endeeteaay. Is she kidding? Do you know what I remember most? Black and white dogs ... EVERYWHERE! There were lots and lots and lots. They are SO common and SO gay. There were a few of us special spaniels including my little brother (who Mum says was looked very smart and not as ruff as me) and, of course, Kate with Crystal and Merlin (who Mum says are both whiz’s on the dance floor). Anyway, Mum says that I am not to call the black and white thing “the black and white thing” any more, that he has a name and that is “Oscar”. Of course, being a special dog, I have three names. Anyway, my proper name is Glynteg Fire Starter. Sometimes Mum calls me Flynndaloony Wigglebum which I think is a bit rude. When the black and white thing arrived, Mum insisted that he had to have a proper name too - Oscar Go Wisely By Hatrack. That doesn’t means he is really smart cos the “Wisely” bit refers to the people who have his real mum and dad and Hatrack is his real dad’s name. Mum thinks that it is a funny name for a dog. I think that Oscar is a stupid name and that she should have called the black and white thing “Pest” or “Smellybum” or “Goodbye”.
Mum says that we have more doggy sport to do this weekend. Can’t a dog have a rest? Oh, that’s right, I am not doing any obedience. Anyway, tomorrow I am going to another flygility tournament and on Sunday I am doing rally. The black and white thing is being a pest (what a surprise!) and I am sick of trying to hide from him so I am going to sit in the back of the car. That means that I am free of the dumb puppy and, if Mum goes anywhere, I go too. Ages ago Mum went away and didn’t take me. She was away FOREVER. Now, I try to get in the car whenever I can. Sometimes I stay there ALL DAY and only come out when it is time for dinner (or I need to pee). Well, I must go before the black and white thing tries to bite my ears or sit on my head again. Wednesday 28 October 2009 Before Mum puts me to bed, I want to tell you everything else that happened at the endeeteaay. Well, on Thursday afternoon just before we left, the black and white thing threw up EVERYWHERE! After the sock incident, Mum was NOT pleased and muttered something about having even less time to get ready. Mum said it must have been something he ate. I bet it was the sock. At least I got to sit in the back of the truck and watch stuff. The black and white thing goes in a crate cos he can’t be trusted and might something else he shouldn’t. Anyway, Jean says we should get a bigger crate. But Mum said that Sharon said that farm dogs like small spaces and, besides, he is an origarme dog (whatever that is). I think he is just deformed. Of course, Mum forgot stuff again. This time it was puppy food. So we had to stop. I mean, couldn’t he wait until Tuesday? It’s not like he was going to be doing anything important like me - except stay out of my way. Mum says we were really lucky to be staying with Anne over the weekend. Yeah, right! In a house full of dogs (I counted 9!), I was the ONLY one who had to sleep in a truck. The sooky black and white thing even got to sleep inside. Anyway, he got in big trouble AGAIN cos he pee’d on Tya and then tried to pee on the bookcase. Just as well he had been outside for a while cos there was no pee left! On Friday morning, I had flygility. This is when Mum made her first mistake. When we practising, she did not tell me jump over the jump after the tunnel, so I didn’t - twice. Mum kept yelling at me - “Over, over” - but that’s not the way we practised it so I ran around that jump and over the rest. Only on the way back, mind you. Well, Mum was a bit worried when it came to the next races cos the course was almost the same. But this time she got it right when we practised. She told me to go over the jump and I did - I am so clever. The problem was it was hot AND I was racing against another black and white thing called Sharky so I let him win ... twice. I thought that would mean I could have a little rest. But no, then Mum took me over to agility. Mum didn’t run properly so I ran around two jumps but I didn’t get eliminated (for once, Mum says) and I even made it onto the results list - 67th. Wahoo! That night Mum came back to the truck with a new vest thing and, do you know what? It has a picture of a black and white thing on it. Just as well it doesn’t look like our black and white thing. I think it looks more like my friend Moss. Anyway, Mum says she loves the vest thing and it will go with all the clothes she brought with her. On Saturday, I just had jumpers cos Mum was judging human puppies after lunch. I thought about not going into the second tunnel but changed my mind. Do you know what, I did EVERYTHING! As I finished, all my human friends from dog school were yelling and Mum was very excited. She even gave me a big handful of treats and said I was her bestest boy. Rae said I did really well cos there were lots of young border collies in the competition. Rae, Gipsy is old - I am NOT OLD! And I can still jump REALLY high. Anyway, Mum told everyone how clever I was and showed them all this little bit of paper that said I was clever and had a clear wownd (whatever that is). Mum says there were lots and lots of dogs in jumpers and that she didn’t care if I didn’t do anything else good all weekend, she would be happy. On Sunday, we had to spend most of the day in the truck cos Mum said she had important stuff to do. The black and white thing stayed in the trailer with these brand new toys that Mum bought specially for him. Of course, he didn’t play with them. When we got home, Mum found out that he had chewed the sleeve of Dad’s second best rain coat that she had borrowed. Anyway, after Mum had finished she took us for a swim cos it was so hot. It was the funnest thing I did all weekend. Rae and Dawn and Karen took their dogs too and we spent ages chasing balls and sticks and swimming. Of course, the black and white thing is scared of water. Mum says it’s because he is a farm dog (yeah, right - he’s scared of sheep too!). Anyway, Rae said he could learn to swim so Mum let Rae drag him into the river. It was so funny. He was trying to walk on the water! On Monday morning we did rally. I think Mum was a bit nervous cos she stuffed up the come fore exercise and then she tangled the lead in my legs ... twice. But it was fun and I thought I would tell everyone how much fun it was ... but only on the left turns. Mum says that this is not cute or even funny but I thought saw Lyn the judge smiling. Well, you know what happened when I did my obedience. I think Mum forgot what she said after we did jumpers, that she didn’t care what I did for the rest of the weekend. But she did care. Mum says that she should have scratched. I didn’t understand cos I am not allowed to scratch or even sniff in obedience. Then I worked out that she thought that we shouldn’t have done obedience. She did smile though when Gabby gave her another little bit of paper that said I had been a good dog in rally. Before we left, Mum let us both have a run in the paddock. And do you know what the black and white thing did ... ran into me on purpose! I am not a sheep and I told him so. Mum kept calling us back, like we were training or something. Of course, the black and white thing ran back straight away - he is such a greaser. I think Mum was a bit tired at the end of the endeeteaay cos we had been driving for a while when she remembered that the black and white thing was still in the trailer and that the back of it might open and he might fall out. She was worried that he might be scared but he looked okay to me. So I was good some of the time at the endeeteaay. Mum says that Brew, Ralph, Jamie, Tip and Moss were REALLY good obedience dogs. Moss got a flash ribbon and a HUGE bag of dog food. Mum says that Nicola hasn’t stopped smiling. And I heard a loud voice saying that Ruffy did really good at agility too. Now Mum says I am not going to do obedience for a while until I can watch her more and stop barking. Mum says I am self wewardin (whatever that is) and I that I have to learn to think. And if I am a good dog, she will let me do some agility and rally. I kind of figured that one anyway cos we went to rally last night. But I couldn’t work out why we went to dog school tonight. Of course, the black and white thing had a lesson. Then Mum got me out of the car. I was sooo excited and told everyone how happy I was. Mum said that was not good behaviour and I had time out. I was a bit worried during the sit stay and I thought it would be better to just go to Mum. Of course, that was not what she wanted. I spent AGES doing sit stays. It is so unfair. But I did get treats, even some sardine cake. Yum! Things aren’t all bad. P.S. Abby and I are going to make our own club for dogs that try ... sometimes. Tuesday 27 October 2009 (cont.) Hehe. Now Monty is in trouble! Mum muttered something about how she couldn’t cope with two dogs with wulwoths bladders (whatever that is) as she mopped the floor. She is a bit grumpy. Maybe she is tired but I don’t know why. I mean, it’s not like she had to think or jump or anything over the weekend. Tuesday 27 October 2009 Mum is not looking so I thought I would just tell you all I am in trouble. I was so happy to be doing something yesterday, even if it was raining, so I told everyone I was having fun. Mum called me a “smart ass” in the heelwork - I wonder if she got points off for that? And then, I was really excited to be doing stays with all those other dogs. I think that with all my barking, I forgot to listen to Mum and, well, there were these other dogs I didn’t know so I thought I would go and say “hi”. This man with a hat came and grabbed me and took me to Mum. Then Mum made me do another sit stay outside. At least it had stopped raining. Mum says I made her look like an idiot but ... no, better not say that or I will be in even more trouble. Anyway, Mum also said that it was just as well I did good in jumpers and rally or else she would have left me tied to a fence! I did not even get an ice cream on the way home. Of course, she thinks the black and white thing was PERFECT all weekend. Anyway, better go before she catches me. Thursday 22 October 2009 Mum says I have to do my blog now cos she is running late, has heaps to do before we leave and doesn’t know if she will be able to do it later at Anne’s. Anyway, so much for having something to do today ... more like punishment! I mean grooming which I HATE. Mum says that, since this is an important competition, I have to look nice. Get real. I am a southern dog, I am meant to look a bit rough. But no, she insisted on brushing me and giving me a wee trim. She said I looked handsome now. Duh! I always look good. The black and white thing is in big trouble though. He ate one of Dad’s newest and bestest wooly socks. Mum said that she didn’t need this sort of thing today and that she would have to go any get Dad some more, like she had time. She didn’t mutter. No, she talked a bit loudly. I don’t know if I am meant to say that cos we are meant to be being trained pozeetif (whatever that is). Anyway, the black and white thing did not get any clicks for eating the sock (no treats either). He just hid under a chair. It was funny until I saw his crate being put in the back of the truck. That can only mean one thing - IT IS COMING TOO! Anyway, gotta go. Mum says she needs to train me a little bit more and do some housework. That will mean getting out the noisy voom cleaner which the black and white thing hates (hehehehehehe). Of course, she shouldn’t bother cos Gipsy and Monty will still leave hair everywhere. See ya all tomorrow at flygility. Wednesday 21 October 2009 What a boring day! Mum spent most of it doing unimportant stuff that seemed to take all day. But we did go to dog school tonight. Of course, the black and white thing came too cos Mum reckons it’s time he started to learn the stuff that I know. It wasn’t long before he got stuck back in his crate (out of sight, where he belongs) and I had my turn. For once Mum didn’t prattle on so I was able to concentrate ... and she was happy. Go figure! I heard her say that she is going to do that on Monday. Betcha she gets all nervous and forgets not to talk. She should take another pill. Of course, she made me do FOUR sit stays. Well, it wasn’t my fault tonight. She put me next to Tip who has a “large personal space” (whatever that is) and, even though he wasn’t looking at me (I bet his mum trained him to do that!), I just knew he didn’t want me sitting next to him. What’s a dog to do? Three more sit stays, obviously! Mum says that if I don’t keep my “furry little backside” on the ground when we practice stays over the next few days, I won’t be able to do obedience on Monday. Mum has obviously got more money than sense (or something). Anyway, only one more sleep until Mum and I go to the endeeteaay. Mum tells me she has something special planned for me for tomorrow. How exciting! Tuesday 20 October 2009 I have had to do soooo much training today! Firstly, a bit of rally so that my friend Jean could try out her course. Mum got a bit ratty cos I wasn’t paying attention. Doesn’t she know that rally is not about precision? Besides, there were all these lovely smells that a spaniel just has to check out. Then we did flygility. I think it was the monthly competition thing cos we only got one practice. Well, Mum should know by now that I need LOTS of practice when there is even a tiny bend in the course. She had to run - a lot - especially in the teams event. I think that Abby, Meg and I must have had the bestest time cos we were there for ages running up and down. Mum, Karen and Rae seemed to be panting a bit at the end. Then tonight, we were off to rally class with Lyn. Of course, I think I am pretty good at this because I know how to do all the tricky stuff, even the funny turn where Mum went one way and I the other. Of course, it is because I am OBEDIENCE dog. Mum says I should be more of an OBEDIENT dog and watch her even when we are doing rally. Yeah, right! Monday 19 October 2009 (cont.) Just back from our walk and Mum said it was “%^&&*$ freezing” and that she hoped that the weather would get better before the endeeteaay or else the orklinders would need their wooly underwear! Me, I don’t mind the cold and I especially like it when it is wet cos I can roll around in the mud and damp ... so much fun! Tomorrow we are going to practise rally which is this new obedience thing that it more fun cos Mum doesn’t get uptight about it. She should take a pill. Oh, she is! Herbal remedy, my paw! Monday 19 October 2009 4 days to go and 3 days until the big car trip. It was raining today so we did some heelwork practise in the front hall....after the black and white thing had a go. What am I, chopped liver? (yum, liver). Anyway, more clicks, more food, think I did pretty damn good. Then she made me do a sit stay because I have been lying down when I shouldn’t. There were the four of us lined up. Well, not Monty. He just checked the floor for any bits of dropped mince. And you know what she did? Spent the whole time feeding the black and white thing lovely, juicy mince! Did I get any? Didn’t I stay sitting the whole time? For my efforts, just one small handful of mince. Life is so unfair. Monday’s aren’t a good day for the black and white thing cos it is rubbish day. The big dumb thing is scared of the noise the rubbish truck makes. I mean, go figure. it’s not like he’s ever been attacked by a rubbish truck or anything but he can hear it when it’s blocks away. The next thing you know he is hiding under the computer. He used to be scared of wheelie bins too until Mum made him walk up and down the street on rubbish day visiting wheelie bins. Today, she declared that the black and white thing (who has been here 6 months too long already) was no longer terrified of wheelie bins. I mean, they don’t do anything. Who would be scared of wheelie bins? Don’t worry, Monty, I won’t tell him. Sunday 18 October 2009 Mum tells me it is just 5 days until the endeeteaay. Don’t know what that is but suspect it is some important canine gathering. Anyway, we went off to agility training this morning - apparently this was “our last chance” to practise. Trisha had set up a smokin’ course - Joanne said it was an “advanced” jumpers course from inglind (wherever that is) with lots of handling challenges. Who cares about the handler? It’s all about the dog, ain’t it? Anyway, you would be surprised at how many wheelies I managed to fit in and, boy, did I tell EVERYONE how much fun I was having! I think I did pretty good - not so sure about Mum - she muttered something about a “mad Spaniel”. You would have thought I had done enough for the day but, no, after lunch I had to go out and practise my heelwork. To be frank, I find this a bit of a yawn but I did get lots of treats - bonus! Then she pulled out a white jump and stood there with her little yellow clicker and said ... nothing! I tried bowing, then spinning, a bit more bowing. In the end I told her that I was getting a bit frustrated and didn’t know what she wanted. So, she said “jump” and I did. Click, treat, yum. Now what? Bow again? But no, she wanted me jump over the stupid jump without being asked ... something about me learning to think for myself. Don’t I do that all the time? Of course, I had to wait until AFTER she had trained the black and white “thing” (puppy, my @#$%!). Of course, the black and white thing’s “heeling is coming along really nicely”. Who cares? I mean, aren’t I the main man. Then last night, I heard her say that we weren’t going to do heelwork to music at the endeeteaay. Something about having no routine. Who cares? Wasn’t I entered in freestyle anyway? Don’t you get lots of points for creativity and isn’t that my middle name? Will she listen to me? Of course not. Well, gotta go. Off for a walk with Mum, Gipsy and Monty. Ha ha! The black and white thing has to stay at home. |
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Anyway, here is a picture of me and the black and white thing. The handsome one is me. Actually, there is not much white on the black and white thing. He does have some more under his tail and on the backs on his back legs and somewhere else that is a bit rude but very funny.